Love is a strong feeling which cannot be explained. If you ask every one about its definition, you will realize that every definition or description is unique. Love and relationship therapists have tried their best but all the theories end up being completely different. There has been a lot of confusion on what love really is since the age of love. Many single dating people pour out enough love lyrics to confess their love for each other but sometimes it comes out as mere flattery. How should you show love? Is there a formula to communicate the feelings? The words “i love you” do not seem enough since the phrase is being misused a lot even in the art of flirting. Many nice guys are having problems with dating since they express in a more subtle way.
Since the age of love, single dating relationships have been faced with a lot of challenges. Nobody knows exactly how to react to which reaction. Some declarations such as “i would rather die than live without you, i do not breathe when you are away” are some of the love lyrics which most people love to hear. This is sheer flattery and yet it does miracles in relationships. If you do not send such a message to a girl, she will soon or later turn her back on you. Is this what we call love? I have never heard of a person who person who died because of being away from her lover and neither have witnessed any one stopping to breathe. This is the art of flirting at play and it is ironic that every body knows it is a lie and yet they believe in it.
The world since the age of love is full of wonders. May be that is why they say love is blind because single dating people seem to think with their hearts but not their minds. The art of flirting is employed in every step of dating to convey love. The love lyrics do not have to be necessarily meaningful or relevant. If you critically analyze the sense in them, you will be surprised to learn that only a few make sense. I have watched people walking hand in hand along the streets. One thing i noted is, not all hand holding singles are in love. The ones who are not passionate about each other exhibit plain and dry atmosphere but two people who are head over heels in love with each other will always put forth an unseen but almost tangible wave of heartfelt emotions.
Many are the times we feel love and see love in other people but we find it hard to define it. Since the age of love it has made many things fall apart and it has as well built some. Single dating lovers find themselves in hot soup when they try to date to impress. It is sad that the bible definition of love is not existent in the seemingly perfect dating relationships. The world has conformed to the stubborn kind of love. Words used as love lyrics in the art of flirting has occupied a bigger space is peoples’ hearts compared to actions.
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Building up the level of trust in a relationship will improve the connection and deep love you have with your partner. Many people are unsure how to build up a good level of trust and there are misconceptions about it as well. It is common for people to assume they know how to make a relationship work, when there really is so much more room for improvement. A common misconception is that simply spicing up a relationship is all that is needed. Generally this is incorrect. Predictability is more important as you will read. This article will address 7 solid ways to build up trust in a relationship.
Trust in a relationship is built first by being reliable in day to day actions. As was previously mentioned, predictability is very important. Mixing things up a bit with new romance techniques like going to different restaurants or the surprise gift might be thought of as a sure way to keep romance alive. But for a relationship to work in the long run, consistent predictability works best at building a trusting relationship. This is something you may not have thought of.
Believing in your partner’s competency is important for trust. It is never good for a relationship if one partner constantly feels the other partner can’t do anything right. Telling the truth is never wrong when said nicely but when you feel that your partner is not competent at anything you destroy trust in the relationship over time.
Your partner in a relationship needs to be able to trust what you say. In essence what this means is that your words need to match your body language. You are not going to build up trust in a relationship if the words coming out of your mouth don’t match what your body is saying. Since people are more visual, your partner is more apt to see the expression on your face first, in a conversation. If you say you are happy but you look sad, it will be hard to build up trust.
Keeping secrets usually destroys trust in a relationship. To keep a secret actually requires a lot of energy, so be honest with your partner. Don’t waste energy keeping secrets and instead use that energy to build trust.
Keep your needs in mind and don’t be afraid to bring them up. If you are reluctant to share your own needs you may end up smothering your partner, giving him or her all of the attention. This usually is not a good way to have a relationship. You don’t need to be selfish but you can be self-centered so that some of your needs are being taken into consideration.
Don’t be afraid to say no. Your partner may voice his or her needs, but you do not have to agree to everything. You can’t be respected and trusted if you say yes to everything, when you actually disagree. Believe it or not a strong partner who can stand up for themselves will build trust in your relationship.
Embrace the difficult parts of your relationship. Turmoil and arguments are not something to constantly shy away from. Just as digging dirt will prepare the soil for a plant, so to digging in the dirt of a relationship will prepare it for better growth and more trust.
You won’t be able to avoid pain when building trust in a relationship. It takes effort like many things do. But you will become a much stronger couple as you work through the pain and increase the trust.
Do you know these easy ways to build trust in a relationship? The things we think of first are often not the things that really make a relationship work. For example, many people think there is a constant need to ‘spice things up’. Guess what, they are wrong! Consistency and predictability are much more important to a relationship in the long run. The following seven methods are sure to improve the connection in your relationship by growing the level of trust.
The first thing, as I mentioned before, is you need to be predictable. I know, this goes directly against the common idea that you need to ‘stir the pot’ to keep the romance sizzling. There’s nothing wrong with trying out a different restaurant, or giving a surprise gift now and then. What you need to realize is that consistency and predictability don’t necessarily mean ‘boring’. Many people find it easier to maintain a relationship that is consistent than one that is like a roller coaster ride. Trust in a relationship is built on the day to day reliability.
Secondly, make sure your words always match the message. Be honest with your partner. Don’t say you are happy if your body language says otherwise. Your partner doesn’t necessarily hear what you say, they read your body language. They see the look on your face and the tone of voice you use, and know you are not happy. You want your partner to be able to trust what you are saying, so make sure your words match your body language. When the body language and the words spoken match; you build trust in a relationship.
The third thing that helps build trust in a relationship is to believe your partner is competent. If you believe that your partner is incompetent to do some things, or maybe you feel they aren’t really competent to do anything. This scornful attitude will eventually erode the trust in your relationship. We all have things we aren’t very good at, but the truth, when communicated in a loving way, should not harm a relationship, it should make it better.
Don’t ever keep secrets from your mate. Secrets will destroy the trust in a relationship faster than almost anything. Be honest and open with your partner. You know the truth always comes out eventually. It’s better to tell the truth right away while the issue is still small. Secrets take an enormous amount of energy to keep. Use that energy to help build the relationship up, not to tear it down.
Fifth, don’t make your partner guess what your needs are. Communicate these needs openly and clearly. It’s okay to be a little self-centered now and then, as long as you aren’t that way all the time. Sometimes you may feel reluctant to tell your partner what your needs are. Don’t forget, they have needs too. Maybe they are apprehensive too. If you open up about your needs, they will feel more comfortable letting you know what they need. Then you both win and continue to build the trust in your relationship.
The sixth thing to remember is to learn to say no. When your partner voices his or her needs, that’s a good thing, but you don’t have to say yes to everything. Especially if what they want is something that violates your own ‘code of ethics’. Asking someone to compromise their values is not a good way to build trust in a relationship. You will be mad at them for asking you to do it and mad at yourself for allowing it to happen.
The final thing to remember is growth. When you plant a garden you begin by digging in the dirt, then you care for your plants by watering and weeding them until they are fully grown. A relationship can be like a garden. It’s a lot of work to nurture your relationship. Digging up the dirt and pulling the weeds can be a painful and exhausting experience, but it prepares the soil of your relationship for future growth. Don’t fear crises’ or turmoil in the relationship, embrace the difficult circumstances and let them become fertilizer for growth. Building trust in a relationship can be painful, but as you work through the pain, you will also gain strength.
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If you have a relationship where you truly trust each other no matter what happens, then you have a powerful and wonderful relationship which can last forever. It is difficult building trust in relationships with all the temptations out there, and this is what makes trust so fragile in the first place. When a partner feels that his/her trust has been betrayed, it can mean the end of the relationship altogether. Restoring trust is a mountainous job, and more often than not the betrayed partner will always have the memory in the back of their mind and the niggling question of whether you will break their trust again.
What if you have cheated on Your Partner? Can you get Him /her back?
In most cases people will tell you that an affair with someone else means the end of the relationship and break ups but this is not always the case. Partners in a relationship can have affairs for different reasons. The affair or lustful sexual encounter can have been in a moment of drunken madness, because of strong attraction to someone at work, or because of pressures at work. Does not matter though, you have betrayed your partners trust and the damage is done. It could have been something lacking in the relationship which caused your partner to cheat. This is something that should be thought about as well. If both partners love each other you can still save the relationship but it is going to be very hard work for the cheating partner. It can take months, and even years building trust in relationships and in one fell swoop an affair can destroy it!
Building trust in relationships requires an adjustment in attitude and actions for both partners in the relationship and after an affair it is going to be hard work rebuilding trust again. Even after one of the partners have had an affair, it is still possible to save a relationship, and if you truly love each other rather try to than throw many happy years together down the drain.
Building trust in relationships through open communication.
Communication is the most important building block to any relationship, not love, not sex like you may think. Sure these are all important building blocks of any relationship but communication tops the list. Can you openly communicate with the person you love if something is troubling you? Are you suspicious and digging behind your partners back into their personal effects because you think they may be having an affair. If you can openly discuss what is troubling you, then you have great trust and communication with your partner. Building trust in relationships comes from having honest open communication at all times. Talk to your partner about anything and everything and they in turn must also never be afraid to approach you. That is real trust in relationships.
Sort out your differences and problems and build trust
If there are characteristics or things that bother you about your partner you should be able to discuss them. By leaving them bottled up inside, they begin to fester and one day in a moment of anger things may be said and your relationship could even end up in tatters. Building trust in relationships means fixing the underlying problems through openly communicating with each other about them. Sometimes that means going in to couples counseling if you cannot find solutions yourselves. The real secret to building trust in relationships lies not in talking about the right things, but in taking action in doing the right things, and sorting out problems and overcoming obstacles.
The little things you can be trusted with
One of the biggest things you can do in building trust in relationships is to make small promises and keep them. If you promise to take the garbage each evening, then make sure to do it and do it consistently as well. When you demonstrate that you can be trusted by always doing the little things, your partner will start realizing that you can be trusted with the bigger things in your relationship as well. Do things together and learn to trust each other through keeping the lines of communication open. When your relationship is experiencing problems and you need help to restore your faith and trust seek guidance and counseling. There are excellent guides available on the market that can help you build save and nurture relationships which in today’s modern society are very precious.
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Do you think spicing things up will make your relationship stronger? If so you better keep reading this because I have news for you. Sometimes the first things we hear are not always the best answers…like “you have to spice it up” to keep it interesting. When actually being predictable is a better way to build trust in a relationship.
How to Build Trust in a Relationship – Concrete Tip One
Reliability is the key to building your partners trust. Excitement is great, but predictability forges a better foundation in your relationship. Now, you don’t want to be boring (yawn) but you do want your lover to feel safe with you…make sense? Surprise them occasionally with different activities, but always be reliable, and their love for you will grow, as you build trust in your relationship.
How to Build Trust in a Relationship – Concrete Tip Two
If you want your partner to feel safe with you make sure your body language matches your words. If you say one thing but your expression, or body language says another. You will be sending a mixed message, and they will lose trust in your words, and eventually you too. If you don’t try to hide your true feelings from your partner, you’ll build more trust in your relationship.
How to Build Trust in a Relationship – Concrete Tip Three
You need to have actual respect for your partner…if you do not respect them, they will be able to sense this no matter how you talk or act (see tip2). Two people have to have mutual respect for each other in order for this relationship to survive. If your partner feels that you believe their a competent person you will be building a lot of trust in your relationship.
How to Build Trust in a Relationship – Concrete Tip Four
This one is really a “no-brainer” but it needs to be said anyways. You don’t want to keep any secrets (short of a surprise trip/gift) from your partner…OK? All the time and energy that goes into keeping a secret could be put to better use. After all when did a lie ever build trust in any kind of relationship?
How to Build Trust in a Relationship – Concrete Tip Five
Open communication is a big key in sustaining a meaningful relationship. If you have something to tell your partner let him/her know what it is. The longer you sit on a problem, the bigger it becomes. Pretty soon it’s bigger than both of you and now you’re screwed. Don’t let lack (or fear) of communication weaken the foundation of trust in your relationship.
How to Build Trust in a Relationship – Concrete Tip Six
Stand your ground…don’t be a push over. It’s hard to respect someone (see tip 3) if they always bend and never stand up to their partner. He/she will think more of you if you stand your ground once in a while, and fight to be heard. Showing your strong character will actually build the foundation of trust in your relationship much faster, than being a “push over.”
How to Build Trust in a Relationship – Concrete Tip Seven
Growth is essential to the survival of just about anything on this planet. Your relationship is no different. Don’t be afraid to “get your hands dirty” once in a while. What I mean is do not be afraid to color outside of the lines to make your point. Sometimes you have to be willing to lose your partner by bringing up issues they don’t want to (but need to) face. You will actually build their respect towards you while building the trust in your relationship as well.
I hope these seven tips have helped you understand a little more about how a healthy relationship works. If you have any questions about this article, please leave me a comment on my Blog in the comment box. What can I do to help you build trust in your relationship? Or better yet; What can you do today to build more trust between you and your partner?
Until next time,
S. Williams
~I know that love hurts but with my help you”ll get strong enough to kick loves ass~
http://www.howtokicklovesass.com
S.Williams is an accomplished Relationship Adviser, who has helped many people get back together with their ex.
He has written many articles and will work one-on-one with you, to help you follow the best plan out there…to win back your ex.
You can sign up for his free videos, tips, and advice by just clicking here. Do it today, so you can have a better tomorrow. ~I know that “love hurts” but with his help you will get strong enough to kick love’s ass.~
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