Steps « I love You Angel

Tag: Steps

Monday, August 2nd, 2010

Love Letters to Write to a Boyfriend – 5 Steps

Nothing quite says “I love you” like love letters. Write to a boyfriend a beautiful love letter – and you just might make him fall more deeply in love with you than he already is! Think love letters are too mushy (and therefore unappreciated) by most men? Think again: in my experience, even some of the toughest-acting guys I have known melted like butter after receiving love letters that follow my simple recipe.

If you are interested in writing love letters to your boyfriend, you might be feeling a bit intimidated by the whole thing. After all, writing is hard, right? Well, not necessarily. If you follow these 5 simple steps you can’t go wrong, and your boyfriend will like putty in your hands:

1. Get into the right mood:

As any writer will tell you, what we write is greatly affected by our mood and our surroundings. To write a successful love letter to your boyfriend, start by getting your head and heart in the right place. Do whatever it takes to get yourself into a mellow, giving mood. Some of the things I do to get into the romantic writing mood include: putting on soft music, lighting incense, taking a warm bath, or even dressing in my favorite lingerie or negligee before sitting down to write. By doing these things, a subtle transformation comes over me and I am in the right place, mentally and physically, to write a love letter to my boyfriend.

2. Use beautiful stationery:

A few words about the writing medium you choose. First -and hopefully this goes without saying – be sure to refrain from e-mailing or texting your love letter to your boyfriend! For some things in life, the formal path is the better option – and writing love letters is one of those things. Nothing says “I didn’t care enough to send the very best” than does an e-mailed love letter!

Second, make sure you choose beautiful stationery for your romantic literary creation. Soft whites are my favorite. Be sure to avoid flashy or gaudy colors. And, I suggest using black ink (brown ink is a close second). Since good stationery can be pricey, be sure to practice writing out your letter on scrap paper until you are satisfied with the words you have chosen. Then, write it out onto your good stationery when you think you are ready to create the final draft.

3. Make it substantive with good content:

Okay, now the tough part – the content. What should you write about? I suggest choosing a specific, simple theme and then sticking to it throughout your letter. Example themes include: recalling how you felt when the two of you first met, and, colorfully recounting a special dinner you had together.

Unless you truly excel at poetry, I suggest avoiding writing your own poems. Feel free to include part of a favorite love poem, but don’t make that the main substance of your love letter to your boyfriend. Rather, stick to your main theme (see above) and write just a few paragraphs. Focus primarily on how you feel and how he makes you feel. Tell him how romantic he makes you feel, and relate those feelings back to your theme.

4. Use flowery language:

Even you are likely not a poet or a professional romance writer, this doesn’t mean you should avoid poetic-sounding language. Have a little fun with your letter. Sprinkle flowery-sounding phrases like “our love,” “your scent,” “deep feelings,” and “true to you” here and there in your letter. He will be impressed, and these words will add to the overall ambience of your letter.

5. Re-write your letter a few times before sending:

Your love letter will not be perfect on the first try. In fact, you may end up writing your letter five or more times before it sounds right (see my suggestion above about using scrap paper). Hint: between each version, let your letter sit for a few hours or days and then re-read it. When you do, any particularly awkward phrases will jump out at you – those phrases should be the first to go. After a few re-writes, your letter should improve significantly.

Once you have completed your love letter to your boyfriend, it is time to send it off. If he already loves you, he will love you even more for the gesture. If he had been doubting the depth of your feelings for him, your letter should help remove that doubt. A well-written, thoughtful love letter can help strengthen any relationship, and it can bring the two of you closer than ever.

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Tags: Boyfriend, Letters, Love, Steps, Write

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Friday, July 30th, 2010

Your Relationship Rescue in 5 Steps or Less

Does it seem like you and your ex always fight even about the mundane things that doesn’t typically start a fight? Do you go to sleep mad at each other and don’t say anything to one another in the morning? If you are tired of living on pins and needles but still love your significant other, then it’s time to seek some advice on how to do a relationship rescue. Why it may seem impossible to fix your relationship, as long as there is still love and you both want to improve the relationship, any relationship can be salvaged.

How do you start with a relationship rescue? You need to follow these five steps outlined here:

First, don’t run away from the problem. All too often couples fight and walk away before resolving the issue. This is the worst thing they can do for each other. Yes, if it seems like it will get physical, both of you take a time out. However, if hurtful words are about all that will happen, take a deep breath and stop arguing with each other and certainly do not walk away. After both of you have calmed down, talk rationally about the issue.

Second, do not bad mouth the other person to people outside the relationship. This only adds fuel to the fire and your friends/family may always want to put their two cents in, making the situation even worse. While you may need someone to talk to about a particular issue regarding your partner, talk constructively about it and get advice. Sometimes, one person outside the relationship can help you see your significant other’s concern.

Third, if you both feel that the relationship rescue needs a bit more work, try talking with a professional about it. In fact, you can do one on one therapy or group couples’ therapy. If you choose to go with the latter, you will learn from other couples about the problems that plague your relationship. Sometimes you may wonder why you even fought at all when you hear other couples’ situations. Don’t be afraid to seek help from outside sources especially if you feel the relationship is worth salvaging. Find a relationship rescue source that puts you both at ease.

Fourth, remember to compromise from time to time. It doesn’t hurt to give in especially if it’s something not important enough to argue over. When it comes to money, calmly talk about what your partner wishes to do and make a compromise. You don’t have to give in on a habitual basis but at least consider every time the feelings of your partner.

Fifth, do something out of the blue for your significant other especially when they least expect it. When a relationship becomes stale and routine, do something that’s out of ordinary to keep the relationship fresh. Believe it or not, this can help heal matters in your relationship. It shows the other person you thought about them.

Now that you know the five steps for the relationship rescue, it’s time to put your plan into action. If you believe your relationship is worth saving, for whatever reason, then save it and work to continue saving it every day.

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Tags: Less, relationship, Rescue, Steps

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Wednesday, July 21st, 2010

Is Your Relationship Worth Saving? Steps on How to Save a Relationship

John works all the time and Marsha does not feel that he is around the family often enough. Marsha spends most of her time taking care of the children and John feels that she does not spend enough time with him. Can this relationship be saved? Should it be saved? Here is how to save a relationship.

First, you must make a decision of whether or not the relationship is worth saving. While just about any relationship can be salvaged through hard work, both parties must make an effort. If one of the two parties is unwilling to try to restore the relationship, then there is not a lot the other party can do.

A lot of people remain in a relationship out of convenience or stay in a marriage for the sake of the children. While the needs of the children should be of the utmost importance, that is often not enough. How to save a relationship begins with both parties making a strong commitment to saving it.

Next, you need to accurately diagnose the real problem or problems in the relationship. One major challenge with how to save a relationship is that many people think the symptoms of the problem are actually the problem itself.

For example, a common misconception by a lot of people is that an affair is actually a problem that leads to break ups. The truth is that an affair is a symptom of a much deeper problem.

An example of this is if a couple doesn’t share any true intimacy, one of the partners may seek it somewhere else. Unless the problem of the lack of intimacy is dealt with, the symptoms are likely to reappear again.

Now, maybe the spouse will be guilted into not having another affair, but they may seek to fill that need in another way, like pornography. When you address the core issues that are causing the symptoms to occur, how to save a relationship becomes much easier.

After you have diagnosed the core issues, you can begin to share your thoughts and feelings. By this I mean both verbalizing your own feelings and listening to the concerns of your partner.

Hold their hand when you are talking about your problems as a signal that you strongly desire to reconnect even when your emotions are swirling. When your partner discusses things that have wounded you, remember that he/she is only doing it to try to restore the relationship.

After you have identified in detail the core issues that are causing the relationship to crumble, create a plan of action together to address and resolve these issues. Then, take immediate action on your plan.

If not spending enough time together is the issue, plan a night every week to go out together on a date. Come up with different creative things to do on these dates and make them memorable.

If lack of communication is the issue, make a commitment to spend a half hour together every night before bed just talking to each other. Then make sure to FOLLOW THROUGH with these commitments.

Finally, understand that how to save a relationship is a work in progress. Even the best relationships that last many decades have their challenges. Be slow to become angry and quick to forgive and you’ll have a much better shot at long-term success.

These are the general steps on how to save a relationship. If your relationship is worth saving, put these steps to action today and your relationship will be on the road to recovery.