What are the ingredients of healthy relationship that everyone is looking for?
Quarrels, fights, gossiping, drinking, smoking are bad signs of what they turn out to be in the relationship. Why I give all these are because based on my personal encounters for a minority of the population in the entire world, these above actions are what the couples may end up into, which is very unhealthy and poor. A healthy relationship has to be considered, but how much the couple can do depends on how keen they want to improve the methods and their personality corrections.
Here are just a few questions to ask if your relationship has to be reviewed again. Is your relationship healthy? Are you happy in your relationship or it is slowly eating away your vitals? Let us find out what is needed for a healthy relationship. It is a relationship- satisfaction to both. A healthy relationship satisfies both the partners. In healthy relationship the partners feel that they have someone who loves them, cares for them and will be always with them in pain and pleasures of life. Do you get this kind of feeling? If not, you need to re-examine the relationship and find out what is needed to improve it.
Here are some of the questions that we and you and your friends can be thinking of. Relationship- how to develop healthy relationship? How to develop healthy relationship? Love is the first need. We are not talking of infatuation but mature love. Love and care for each other nourishes life. Only when you love and care for somebody, you will make efforts to go to extra mile to make the relationship work. It is very true. You have to believe for yourself that you can make a relationship successful if you have all the attributes that you have, like love and care which are very important in making up relationship.
Furthermore, partners in a healthy relationship have many common traits. Life goals, values, beliefs and, emotional drivers are common in a healthy relationship. If you are going to argue about every decision, because your goals and values are different, the relationship will suffer. Similarly, if what drives your emotions leaves your partner unaffected, you both will never satisfy each other emotionally. That will again make it an unhealthy relationship. If a sight of a beautiful waterfall moves you and your partner tells you that there is nothing great about that and that you should move on, you would surely hate yourself or your partner.
Moreover, a very Good communication is one more essential element for healthy relationship. If you are communicating well with each other, you can solve many issues which otherwise may blow up your relationship. Communication also means good understanding of each other and understanding of verbal and non-verbal signals. In addition, a healthy relationship is most important for your growth and to keep you happy most of the times. Also, you have to find something you love and are passionate about, try to help other people with your talent and then simply be the best in it! There is no greater fulfilment than finding your life purpose and serving others. Then you will not only have your blueprint for a happy life, you will eventually notice that you have gotten over your break up or divorce on the way:
If you are suffering from a break up or divorce right now, I sincerely wish you that you will find your path and come to a higher understanding of your true Self. Only then you will be ready to find the partner you deserve. This is a small but vital fraction of the healing process. There are more things to consider especially in the first phases directly after a break up or divorce. Watch out for further articles on how to get over a break up on this site.
Indeed, life is short. Don’t let another day go by without taking a chance on happiness. You will never know until you try, so remember to make a move today. It can change or affect the rest of your life, therefore, at the very least, you can try to come out something for your ex love partner during your weekend plans. With a little practice, perseverance and patience, I believe that your relationship could be enhanced with the tips that I have shared earlier. If you have faced any problems with your loved ones, do not hesitate to visit this piece of article again.
I really have a strong belief that if you can understand what I have explained and applied what you have learnt from this piece of article, your problems can be eventually solved and your making up relationship can become more stable and stronger. I wish all the best for your making up relationship with your partner. Do always remember to spread word of mouth to your fellow friends for supporting the decision of having making up than breaking up.
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You will also learn how to reverse the situation if you have already done those things that should NEVER be done.
Jim Lim Da Hong, sgtopmarketseller@gmail.com, Freelance SelfEmployed Graduate
Men and women tend to function from two completely different directions when it comes to how they behave in a relationship. This behavior is most prominent in regard to how they communicate and their levels of understanding.
According to studies written by relationship counselors, communication is responsible for more than half of the failed relationships that have been observed and documented.
This is not news to anyone who has experienced a relationship that has lasted more than 30 days. What may be interesting is the variety of issues that cause relationships to fail.
I’ve been on both sides of a broken relationship over my years of living and working as a counselor. Once as a child of a functioning but broken home and once as the spouse who left the relationship.
What I learned from each perspective I have written into a battery of counseling tips and conversations that serve to support couples. The saying, “Knowledge is power,” rings true when it comes to relationship rescue. If you have 5 minutes to spare to focus on your relationship skills, you can learn to make your relationship lighter. By lighter I mean, the heaviness that many relationships carry is based on baggage being carried by the partners. Most often the partners carry this baggage silently.
The primary issue that impacts the relationship is not the baggage or the presenting issues that cause or contribute to the failure of the relationship. What tends to feed the decline is the silent suffering combined with a subconscious belief that the other partner should be aware of this baggage, even though neither of them has given anything more than a hint of what is being carried.
Making your relationship lighter may be an alien term or merely a distracting thought with a funny name. Take 5 minutes to open your mind to some new possibilities that may be hidden in your relationship.
John Maxwell, author of “Relationships 101,” says, “People don’t care how much you know, until they know how much you care.” When it comes to relationships, most often the male and the female partner fail to communicate this fundamental message.
Looking deeper into ways of strengthening your relationship beyond the physical level of living together, means each partner must be deeply committed to the other partner. This includes taking the risk of assuming the other partner is carrying baggage silently.
This is not a license to pry or aggressively intrude into the other partner’s privacy, because privacy is always vital in a relationship. Communication is not expecting your partner to disclose every details of their day. Communication travels to emotional locations untouched by words alone.
What helps to understand the balance that is needed begins by looking into the mirror and searching for a way of getting a handle on one’s own baggage. It often occurs in the partnering of individuals that while opposites attract, these opposites also share experiences.
It is documented that children who grown up in a home where a spouse has been abused will mostly find themselves in an abusive relationship as adults. Recognizing the reality of the presence of this baggage in one’s self forms the basis of the subconscious desire for the other partner’s understanding in the form of silent knowing.
Additionally, this type of baggage also provides a basis for deeper understanding of the partner’s own behavior as well as any communicational barriers that have been observed to exist.
The healing and preventative process must begin with a message and an understanding that baggage, both known and unknown, exists in the relationship. Both partners must also recognize that communication is a major player in both the success of their relationship, while lack of communication can be the primary reason for any potential for the failure of the relationship.
”Relationships of trust depend on our willingness to look not only to our own interests, but also the interest of others.”
Peter Farquharson
“Happily ever after” is a term which exists only in fairy tales. In real life every relationship has its share of bumps and problems. In fact having occasional arguments is even considered healthy. But if mutual bickering and fights become an everyday phenomenon, then you know your relationship is headed for trouble.
A lot of song writers and poets have aptly said “love just ain’t enough!” Mutual love may be the most important building block of a relationship, but love alone can’t sustain the relationship. You might love your partner or spouse to death but may still find your relationship battling stormy weather. The reason could be that your relationship has one or more of the following elements missing: trust, open communication, respect, honesty and/or complete commitment. However, if you have the will and desire to make your relationship work, these problems can be sorted out.
How to make your relationship work?
Acknowledge that you have a problem
Blame- game is the common factor in almost all troubled relationships. People tend to get so blinded with anger that they lose their objectivity. Ego of course adds fuel to the fire. Sadly, this raging fire of anger and ego burns down the most vital building block of a relationship- love. It is therefore important that both the partners acknowledge the fact that they have a problem and refrain from finger pointing.
Communicate
Often we don’t share our feelings with our partner/spouse for the fear of hurting them and some times we may avoid speaking our mind in order to avoid an argument. Continuation of this kind of behavior has the potential to destroy a relationship. Not sharing your feelings will lead to simmering resentment within you and the other person will continue with their life without even realizing that their behavior is hurting you. The result can be an explosion of bottled up emotions, leaving your partner bewildered and deeply hurt. Open channels of communication are therefore vital for the health of any relationship and remember communication need not always be in an argumentative tone or a high pitched voice. It’s important to keep your ego aside and communicate your feelings in a loving manner, in order to save yourself and your loved one from pointless hurt.
Relationship counseling
When you are angry or deeply hurt, you may blow small problems out of proportion. Just as love sometimes clouds our objectivity, hurt and anger have a similar effect too. You may be tempted to ask a friend or a close relative to interfere or “make the other person see the sense of your argument”, but remember this approach can easily backfire as friends and relatives may not be objective and biased towards you. It’s therefore advisable to seek relationship counseling if both you and your partner are open to the idea. You may feel hesitant about confiding in a stranger, but remember a counselor is not just a stranger but a trained therapist. Just like you go to a doctor to treat an illness, you can visit a relationship counselor to treat your ailing relationship.
Clinical Hypnosis
If either of you have a problem with insecurity, jealousy or commitment phobia, the reason could be your past. Clinical hypnosis could help you in this case. Sometimes some past events or happenings may get so firmly embedded in your subconscious that you might end up taking a lot of actions because of those past memories, without even realizing it. Through clinical hypnosis a trained therapist will be able to delve into your subconscious and help you release the memories which are hampering your relationship and re-program your mind.
Positive affirmations
When a relationship is in trouble we tend to indulge in lot of negative self-talk about ourselves and our relationship. Not only does such behavior push the relationship further into the abyss of loneliness it also affects our confidence and desire to make the relationship work. Repeated negative self-talk ends up strengthening our belief that our relationship is beyond repair. However, if instead of telling yourself how miserable you are and how imperfect your relationship is, if you could focus on making your relationship work, not only will you feel more motivated to bring your love life back on track but you’ll also feel more confident about being able to do it. You can either make up your own affirmations or practice the following in front of a mirror everyday:
“I love and appreciate myself the way I am”
“I deserve to love and be loved”
“I am surrounded by love at all times”
“The universe supplies me with endless love”
“All is well in my world”
Visualization techniques
Have you ever noticed that when you visualize something negative your body and mind start reacting as if you are already facing that situation? For example if you visualize you and your partner/spouse parting ways, you might feel a lump in your throat and your heart may start sinking. If you continue with your negative visualizations your body and mind start unconsciously pushing you in the direction of what you visualize the most. Similarly if you visualize yourself in a fulfilling relationship with your spouse/partner, your body and mind will start preparing you to live those happy images and will push you to push to fruition the visions of a healthy relationship.
These tips and techniques will be able to help you build a healthy relationship only if you and your partner are open to the idea of changing for the better, to make your relationship work.
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